Worker suspects employee died of embarrassment

Since worker informed another employee that her skirt was caught in her underwear, worker doesn’t recall seeing that employee in the company hallways for months. Worker suspects employee may have gone home and actually died of embarrassment. Worker never heard of anyone actually dying of embarrassment before, but considering the employee, it’s a possibility for a first.

Dr. Oz audience member too excited to receive lame prize

Audience member in Dr. Oz show got way too excited to get called up on stage to feel up dead organs and receives lame prize to keep bowel running regularly. Viewer suspects audience member confused by watching Oprah and Ellen shows where the audience members actually get fun stuff; not cheap stuff you can pick up in the grocery every day. Who knew answering questions about regular bowel movements could get one so excited. Freaks.

Announcer botches real fire notice; not surprising

Seeing as how when the company does standard fire drills where the announcer usually botches up the announcements anyway, it didn't come as a real surprise to working occupants when a real fire occurred that the announcer completely panicked and instructed everyone to get out now! Panic, really. Fortunately, people left the building in a relatively organized fashion.