Apartment dweller considering nicer place with smaller kitchen versus building with good sized kitchen but filled with creepy men

When leaving apartment door to do a garbage chute drop in apartment hallway, apartment dweller temporarily froze when she found creepy "Bruce Willish" (the name given to "not Bruce Willis but has some uncanny similarities to Bruce Willis, but much creepier" man) in the hallway with three dogs. Creepy Bruce Willish mentioned that the dogs were friendly, but woman with garbage didn't mention that it wasn't the dogs that was concerning her, it was Bruce Willish. Fortunately, the elevator came seconds later, bringing awkward moment to an end and the temporary departure of Bruce Willish and dogs. Woman was able to reconvene in garbage drop off once the elevator doors closed.

In a related story, the same apartment dweller discovered that a former creepy resident had actually not moved out, but that she had successfully managed to avoid him for some time without having to use rock climbing gear to repel down the side of the building. (Apartment dweller reminded of saving funds to move.)

Sarcasm mistaken for sincerity in entertainment committee

When an entertainment committee member proposed an idea for hiring clowns for a group of grown-ups, other committee members were perhaps showing too much enthusiasm in their sarcasm when they responded with "Yeah. Sure. That's a *great* idea. Why not ask them to do balloon shaping while at it?"
Not realizing other committee members were being sarcastic, member checked off "clown and balloon shaping" very enthusiastically on their check list.
Later, when people asked why there was a clown making balloon shapes in the parking lot during a food truck event, remaining committee members did a combination of shoulder shrugging, while others just slipped off without a comment.

Work colleagues slightly bummed they didn't get to use Groucho Marx disguise

Employee in office suspected office space surveyor was actually just making notes of all the things they would rather be doing than checking to see who or how a cubicle space is being used. After 5th time office space surveyor walked around and made notes in tablet, employee thought of ways of messing with office space surveyor when he came around the next hour -- like changing desks with co-worker, occupying an empty desk, or putting on Groucho Marx glasses. After talking to work colleagues, they all realized they were a bit disappointed they didn't get to buy and use Groucho Marx glasses in time for the next round of the office surveyor.
In another part of the office floor, another employee seriously considers buying a Magic Mesh Door and doorbell to make her cubicle more like a home office.

Bored employee considers interrupting meeting

Bored employee, proud of self toenail polish job, wonders if she should inappropriately bust into a meeting to show the people the nail polish job just to see the stunned and confused looks on their faces. Employee decides probably better not and harbors pride secretly instead.

Manager checks on her Dora the Explorer cup

While overhearing coworkers discussing if the other had left a bright pink Dora the Explorer cup in the lunchroom, manager in close proximity listening in quickly goes to check the lunchroom to see if it was her Dora the Explorer cup lost ages ago. Manager was slightly disappointed to discover it was not her lost Dora cup, but briefly considers snatching it anyway.

Woman hoping to ride elevator solo has dreams crushed

Woman in elevator, hoping to ride the elevator by herself gets annoyed as another woman makes it in while the doors were closing. If that wasn't bad enough the woman who managed to slip her way in kept the doors open so that a few other people could get on. The woman who was hoping to have a solo ride felt completely defeated especially as the people who slipped on actually spoke to each other and greeted each other with "good morning".

Office snoop just as awkward in background of news report as everyday practice

Office snoop spies opportunity to walk back and forth in background of news camera to see what’s going on, looking just as unnatural listening on camera as she usually does when snooping on co-workers.

Driver misses opportunity to use new swear words

Driver behind couple who carelessly weaved around on bikes in road for opportunity to pass finally honked horn as man went off onto sidewalk but woman kept veering in front of car. Apparently cycling couple would have obviously preferred driver to honk after woman got hit as opposed to warning honk to prevent getting hit. Driver was tempted to pull over and share some recently learned cuss words (C$#@j#$#$@$% t#%@##?&*#t). with them after male cyclist flipped off driver for not hitting woman on bike. Best guess to new words learned gets a run over shoe (or not).

Not even in your dreams said the brain to the local woman in her dreams

Local woman comes across the meaning “not even in your dreams” first hand when responsibilities slip into her dreams. While dreaming of attempting to do something frivolous she realized she had not found out the cost and upon finding out, realized that she could not afford it – even in her dreams – and then the alarm went off.

Sasquatch picture taker suspected

Person on horseback suspects friend who took blurry photo of her just might be the same person who took the elusive blurry Sasquatch picture in the woods or they went to the same class for classic blurry photo taking.

Person's response to door to door sales says it all

One person says it all with, “for Christ’s sake!” in response to elderly ladies going door to door at an apartment complex promoting (selling) memberships to their church (and most likely so you can chip into roof fund).

Assemby furniture used as form of exercise

After realizing that she wasn't going to make it to her exercise class in the morning, local woman does some deep breathing exercises before heading out to a store to purchase a piece of furniture that will involve assembly. Many exercises were involved in the purchase and assembly of small bookshelf unit, involving - taking stairs,
- walking around two levels of the store,
- lifting item onto buggy
- pushing buggy once picking up parcel from aisle and bin number,
- overheating in line,
and then experiencing different exercises once putting the furniture together, such as:
- laying out parts
- picking up the Allen key every bloody time it dropped from hands (a lot)
- screwing and unscrewing bolts when the last two holes refused to line up despite everything else looking straight
- exercising mouth muscles as profanity flew freely,
and finally putting finished piece of furniture in it's place.
Any potential guilt woman initially felt for missing exercise class was quickly wiped clear by furniture assembly, and if anything, probably burned more calories in doing so.

Road ragers end up at police station to explain themselves

A local man experienced a unique road rage incident when he got flipped off by a woman in traffic. Apparently woman who flipped off man felt entitled to flip people off. After local man flipped woman back off, woman called the police on him and both of them ended up having to spend an afternoon in the police station explaining themselves. Entitled woman obviously didn't know the rules of to flip off and getting flipped off.

In related news, incident of entitled woman reminds a friend of local man about when another woman felt that she didn't have to line up to get petrol. Apparently, entitled woman's thinking involved that she could park off to the side and tell anyone she pleased that they need to let her get gas. Local man's friend explained to confused entitled woman that's not how it worked and provided woman with option of standing to watch the local man's friend get gas or watch from the car. Entitled hysterical woman had a tantrum before taking option two -- watching local man's friend fill up with gas from with her cross-over vehicle. And everyone had a happy holiday.

Transit company missing "something" about subway experience in retro posters

Transit company for cosmopolitan area introduces retro posters that customers could purchase. One poster in particular seemed to be missing a few things. For one, the woman looked way too comfortable, had nobody crowding a seat beside her for when you do happen to get a seat. The poster also seemed to be lacking the persons who would have been standing -- slightly pushed up against her -- with their crotch or bottom in her face; tough decision on what angle to stand in that predicament, and then there was the matter of no spilled beverage stain on the ground. It just doesn't match up to the same experience. Transit company might need to work on recapturing the essence of riding the red rocket.